The Beatles get Wise (and Morecambe)
They had to meet some time, Eric Morecambe and Ernie Wise and the Beatles – John, George, Paul and Ringo. And when they did it was a certainty there would be a riot of fun.
Eric, Ern and The Beatles
Which is just what happened when they teamed up for next Saturday’s Morecambe and Wise Show and met for rehearsals at Elstree Studios.
The fun began even before the formal introductions were over and the cameraman and staff are still giggling….
EW: Hello boys. Great have you on the show. Just great. Er, will you sign your autographs?
EM: On these blank cheques please.
PM: Hi, great to meet you. We’re your fans. Really. We’ve been watching you for years. Or so it seems. In fact me dad took me to see you when I was a little boy.
EW: Hey, haven’t you got a little dad.
EM: Ah, but he’s got a lovely haircut.
EW: (shaking hands with George) Hello, I’m Ernie Wise, the one with…
EM: Short fat hairy legs.
GH: Hi, I’m George, the one with…
RS: A short fat hairy head!
JL: Seriously. We are Morecambe and Wise fans. I once saw you walking around Liverpool when you were appearing in a pantomime there.
EM: Funny. I’ve never walked around Liverpool in a pantomime.
JL: Must have been a strolling company.
EM: At least we can still walk around Liverpool. You can’t. They’d have you. The girls. You know.. scragged, you’d be. Not us. We can wander around unmolested. Providing we stay in our cars.
EW: Who wants to walk around Liverpool anyway?
Voice from the studio floor: “Will you lot stop nattering and start working?”
BEATLES: Ooh, it’s tough at the top.
EM: At the mop-top!
On with the show. It’s a long day. Getting on for 10pm before the last gag has been fired and the final echo of Beatle beat has faded away.
PM: Well, we’ve got to go, like. We’re doing a midnight concert in town.
RS: In Owlsville.
EM: I know it. (sings) So until the day that one comes along, owl string along with you…
TB: Ger on wi you…
EM: Here Ern. They went through the door. We can never do that. How come they walked right through it? Just like that. They’ve got influence. That’s what it is. Great lads, though. A real laff. And such workers. What a real good laff we’ve had. Ah, well, let’s have another…
© TV Times 1964